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Wedding Planning: Managing Unsolicited Advice

You’ve got that jewel on your finger and then a Dazzling smile on your face.  You’re engaged!

Bride and groom in romantic moment at destination wedding in Puerto Vallarta Mexico.

Soon after the warm hugs and congratulations from excited family and friends will come the unsolicited advice.  From subtle suggestions to boisterous opinions, you’ll hear it all.   It’s inevitable.  The good news is that you can be proactive about managing it while protecting family relationships and your own sanity in the process.

Set Wedding Boundaries.

Before talking to anyone else about the actual wedding celebration, talk to each other.  Discuss and create a very specific set of priorities and non-negotiables for your experience.

From the onset of wedding conversations, this list will guide you in understanding the areas in which you can show flexibility as well as the areas in which you will remain firm in your decisions.

You are combining families – sometimes from different cultures, religions or backgrounds – and certain elements of the wedding may mean more to some than to others.  

Bride and groom exchange rings during a destination wedding in Punta Mita Mexico.

Talk through family traditions that you would like to honor and those that you will respectfully forego.  Will children be invited to the celebration?  Discuss your dream of tacos and your parents’ dream of a formal four-course dinner.  Will you incorporate cultural wardrobe?  Are you open to prayer during the ceremony?  Identify all the potentially challenging situations and create a united front before discussing the topics with family and friends.  

Consider this active communication a perfect opportunity to practice for a healthy marriage.

Be Authentic.

Social media is full of unsolicited wedding ideas and advice.  Your signature color has always been lilac, but after scrolling through ten events featuring Illuminating, Pantone’s gorgeous yellow tone of 2021, you’re feeling, well, illuminated and considering an epic yellow wedding. 

Push PAUSE on social media for a minute.  Allow your authenticity to guide wedding decisions.

Bride and groom kiss on the beach after their destination wedding ceremony in Punta Mita Mexico

Brainstorm your vision of the wedding event before BFF-ing with Pinterest and Instagram.  Think about your personal style, the Hell Yes’s in your day-to-day life and the places, elements and influences that play a part in your love story. 

If you wake up every Saturday morning and hike four miles to the best nutella croissants in town, then skip the wedding cake and serve nutella croissants!  

Do you get all scratchy just thinking about sand sticking to your feet?  Then, no matter how beautiful the photos are of beach ceremonies, definitely choose a garden or patio venue and stay off the sand!

The vision you create for yourselves, before following all the wedding hashtags, will serve as an arrow that points you in the direction of an authentic celebration.

Assume the Best.

Advice – even the unsolicited kind – is most often given from a place of love.  When you find yourself on the receiving end of suggestions and opinions you have not asked for, assume the person has the best intentions and then choose how to react with love.

Bride and groom after their wedding ceremony in Punta Mita Mexico

Here are a few ideas to be prepared:

Kindly reassert your boundaries.  

Share that you are currently considering all options as a couple and will make a decision that feels best and aligns with who you are once you are ready.

State that you have already made your decision based on how you choose to begin your new life together.

Say “Thank you for the enthusiasm.  We can’t wait for you to experience everything we have carefully selected for our wedding.”

Ask for a rest.  Wedding planning often becomes the topic of conversation and you can simply request an afternoon free of wedding talk!

Smile and nod and let it go.

Provide a gentle reminder that your wedding is a celebration of love and decisions made are often based on practicalities and principles; they are not meant to be hurtful to anyone involved.

Allow your love story, your own values and integrity guide you in creating an authentic experience!

Love Kristin

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They nailed it!

Kristin and her team are truly amazing. We were a bit concerned on how the planning process would go for...

Large wooden tables with greenery and pampas grass with among candles and glassware for a destination wedding reception in mexico

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Large wooden tables with greenery and pampas grass with among candles and glassware for a destination wedding reception in mexico
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Beautiful bride in white dress with sweetheart neckline stands on the beach with her bridesmaids and holds moody wedding bouquets at her destination wedding in Sayulita, Mexico

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Beautiful bride in white dress with sweetheart neckline stands on the beach with her bridesmaids and holds moody wedding bouquets at her destination wedding in Sayulita, Mexico
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Bride and groom stand hugging each other with palm trees behind them at their destination wedding in Punta Mita, Mexico

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Bride and groom stand hugging each other with palm trees behind them at their destination wedding in Punta Mita, Mexico
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Bride and groom pose with their wedding party holding moody bouquets at their destination wedding in Punta Mita, Mexico
There are not enough words to describe how amazing Kristin and her team are. From the moment I inquired about working with the Dazzlign Details down to the very last second of our wedding, Kristin really went out of her way to make sure everything was perfect. I tend to be extremely picky and from the beginning of the planning process, it seemed like Kristin could read my mind and ask me about a detail of the wedding before I even had to worry about it. She’s extremely organized and maps out a full planning timeline so you know exactly what needs to get taken care of by when so you’re not pulling your hair out (I will admit we fell behind schedule due to busy work schedules but Kristin was very good about sending us gentle reminders to stick to the agenda and we’re so grateful for it as it saved us loads of stress as we inched closer to the day of the wedding) a week before the wedding trying to scramble to finish up last-minute details. Besides being extremely organized and always two steps ahead of you, Kristin really has a vision for how to put the perfect wedding together based on your tastes. I always felt like I couldn’t put a cohesive vision together based on the jumbled thoughts I had in my head of my “perfect wedding.” But with her help, she pieced all of my random ideas together into the most beautiful wedding that my husband and I could’ve possibly imagined. All of our guests raved that this was one of the best weddings they’ve been to and we have Kristin to thank for it. The food/drink was amazing, the service was great, and the decor/ambiance was exactly what I had imagined. We’re so...

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Bride and groom exit their ceremony after the kiss at their destination wedding in Punta Mita, Mexico

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Bride and groom exit their ceremony after the kiss at their destination wedding in Punta Mita, Mexico
Look no further! Kristin and team are phenomenal! If you are searching for the perfect wedding planner....stop right now! You've found her! Kristin is the absolute best, and made all of our wedding dreams come true. From the food, to the decor, the ambiance, the flowers, etc. everything turned out exactly as we hoped and imagined. We had so many friends and family tell us that our wedding was one of the best they had ever been to! Kristin did not disappoint in the flawless execution of our big day. I am an extremely organized planner myself, and throughout the entire process she was amazing to work with. Kristin was amazing with communication, in providing recommendations,  ongoing guidance and advice.  I actually miss her already and wish we could redo the wedding! She is absolutely amazing at what she does. Long story short, we were beyond happy with our wedding, loved every single moment, and can not recommend Kristin more highly!! She is hands down the most wonderful wedding planner and truly dazzling!!!
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The Dazzling Details